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Frank Zappa

Act I SCENE FOUR CREW SLUT

But one night, at the
Social Club meeting Mary didn"t show up...
She was sucking cock backstage at The Armory
In order to get a pass To see some big rock group for free...

Backstage at the local Armory, MARY, in her little white dress,
is wiping the remnants of her performance off the side of her mouth
as LARRY (the guy from the garage who quit the band in order to make
an honest living) zips up the front of his stinking boiler suit and sings
to the same teen-age girls who were stomping and clapping a little while ago,
as they kneel with their little pink mouths open near the crew bus,
hoping to save the price of admission by performing acts of Hooverism on
the jolly lads who set up the P. A. System.


LARRY:
Hey Hey Hey all you girls in these
Industrial towns
I know you"re prob"ly gettin" tired
Of all the local clowns
They never give you no respect
They never treat you nice
So perhaps you oughta try
A little friendly advice

And be a CREW SLUT
Hey, you "ll love it
Be a CREW SLUT
It"s a way of life
Be a CREW SLUT
See the world
Don"t make a fuss, just get on the bus
CREW SLUT
Add water, makes its own sauce
Be a CREW SLUT
So you don"t forget, call before midnite tonite
The boys in the crew
Are fust waiting for you

You never get to move around
You never go nowhere
I know yer prob"ly gettin" tired
Of all the guys out there
You always wondered what it"s like
To go from place to place
So, darlin", take a little ride
On the mixer"s face

Be a CREW SLUT
Just follow the magic footprints
Be a CREW SLUT
Hey, you"ll love it!
Be a CREW SLUT
It"s a way of life
I ain"t gonna squash it
And you don"t need to wash it!
CREW SLUT
Hey, I"ll buy you a pizza
CREW SLUT
Of course I"ll introduce you to Warren
The boys in the crew
Are only waiting for you

At this point, the road crew, as all road crews must from time to time,
borrow some of the big rock group"s equipment and have a blues jam
session, indicating to the kneeling maidens that they are endowed with
a great deal of raw talent, as well as massive meat. Obviously impressed
with LARRY"S ability to suck so hard on his harmonica that screeching
little noises come out of it, MARY kneels again and reaches upward in
gestures of supplication, listening intently as LARRY continues to sing...


LARRY:
Well you been to Alabama, girl,
"N" Georgia too
"N" all the boys in thecrew
Is bein" good to you
I know yer sayin" to yourself
"This is the way to go
"Cause when you need a little extra
They will give you some mo"
"Cause you"re the CREW SLUT

MARY:
I"m into leather...

LARRY:
That s good! A lot of the boys in the crew
Love leather...

MARY:
And rubber...

LARRY:
Yeh, they like rubber too... shrink- tubing
With a hair dryer...

ROAD CREW CHORUS:
Trade your spot on the bench
For a guy with a wrench

MARY:
Ha ha ha...

LARRY:
You like that, huh?
I told you you"d love it...
It"s a way of life!

ROAD CREW CHORUS:
The guys in the crew
Have got a present for you!

MARY:
A present for me?

LARRY: We got a present for you!

MARY:
Whaddya got?
Whaddya gonna give me?

LARRY:
It looks just like a TeleFunken U-47
You"ll love it...

MARY: With leather?

CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER:
Eherrr, eh eh...This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER again...
And so MARY was enticed away from Joe
By an evil barbarian with a wrench in his pocket
Lured into a life of SLEAZERY
With the entire road crew of some Famous Rock Group (I don"t know whether it
wasToad-O... I don"t know... I"ll check it out)
Again we see MUSIC
Causing BIG TROUBLE! 
Другие исполнители:
Разные люди
Ногу Свело
Рок-Острова
Кикабидзе Вахтанг
Авторские
KELLY ROWLAND
La Oreja Del Van Gogh
Baccara
NO AUTHORITY
Уматурман
Лаэртский Александр
Панайотов Александр
Roméo et Juliette
Герман Анна
Ариана
Zaunpfahl
Lara Fabian
Иван-кайф
Marilyn Manson
Blue System
U2
Alchemist
Peter Gabriel

Тексты песен Frank Zappa :

200 Years OldAbsolutely FreeAct I SCENE TWO JOE"S GARAGE
Act I PRELUDEAct I SCENE EIGHT LUCILLE HAS MESSED MY MIND UPAct I SCENE FIVE THE WET T-SHIRT CONTEST
Act I SCENE FOUR CREW SLUTAct I SCENE SEVEN WHY DOES IT HURT WHEN I PEE?Act I SCENE SIX ToAD-O LINE
Act I SCENE THREE CATHOLIC GIRLSACT I PRELUDEAct II SCENE ELEVEN SY BORG
Act II SCENE FOURTEEN OUTSIDE NOWAct II SCENE NINE A TOKEN OF MY EXTREMEAct II SCENE TEN STICK IT OUT
Act II SCENE THIRTEEN KEEP IT GREASEYAct II SCENE TWELVE DONG WORK FOR YUDAAct III SCENE EIGHTEEN A LITTLE GREEN ROSETTA
ACT III SCENE FIFTEEN HE USED TO CUT THE GRASSAct III SCENE FIFTEEN HE USED TO CUT THE GRASSAct III SCENE SEVENTEEN WATERMELON IN EASTER HAY
Act III SCENE SIXTEEN PACKARD GOOSEAdvance RomanceAmerica Drinks And Goes Home
America DrinksAmnesia VivaceAndy
Any Downers?Any Way The Wind BlowsAnything
Artificial RhondaBaby SnakesBaby, Take Your Teeth Out
Bamboozled By LoveBe In My VideoBeauty Knows No Pain
Big Leg EmmaBilly The MountainBlack Page #2
Bobby Brown Goes DownBow Tie DaddyBriefcase Boogie
Broken Hearts Are For AssholesBrown MosesBrown Shoes Don"t Make It
Bwana DikCall Any VegetableCamarillo Brillo
Can"t Afford No ShoesCarolina Hardcore EcstasyCharlie"s Enormous Mouth
Cheap ThrillsCheepnisCity Of Tiny Lights
Clowns On VelvetCocaine DecisionsConcentration Moon
ConeheadCosmik DebrisCruising For Burgers
CucamongaDaddy, Daddy, DaddyDance Contest
Dancin" FoolDebra KadabraDeseri
Did You Get Any OnyaDirty LoveDo You Like My New Car?
Dog BreathDon"t Eat The Yellow SnowDoreen
Drafted AgainDrop DeadDrowning Witch
Dumb All OverDummy UpEasy Meat
Eddie Are You Kidding?Electric Aunt JemimaEvelyn, A Modified Dog
Excentrifugal ForzFather O"blivionFifty-fifty
Fine GirlFlakesFlorentine Pogen
Flower PunkFor Calvin (And His Next Two Hitchhikers)For The Young Sophisticate
Fountain Of LoveFrogs With Dirty Little LipsGet A Little
Go Cry On Somebody Else"s ShoulderGoblin GirlHalf A Dozen Provocative Squats
Harder Than Your HusbandHarry-as-a-boyHarry & Rhonda
Harry, You"re A BeastHe"s So GayHeavenly Bank Account
Honey, Don"t You Want A Man Like Me?How Could I Be Such A Fool?Hungry Freaks, Daddy
I Ain"t Got No Heart*I Ain"t Got No HeartI Come From Nowhere
I Have Been In YouI Promise Not To Come In Your MouthI"m A Beautiful Guy
I"m Not SatisfiedI"m So CuteI"m The Slime
If Only ShewouldaIn FranceInca Roads
It Just Might Be A One-shot DealJelly Roll Gum DropJewish Princess
Jones CrusherJumbo, Go AwayLater That Night
Latex Solar BeefLet"s Make The Water Turn BlackLonely Little Girl
Lonesome Cowboy BurtLove Of My LifeLuigi & The Wise Guys
MagdalenaMagic FingersManx Needs Women
Mom And DadMother PeopleMotherly Love
Mudd ClubMuffin ManMy Guitar Wants To Kill Your Mama
Mystery RoachNanook Rubs ItNo Not Now
No. No. No.Oh NoPanty Rap
Peaches IIIPenguin In BondagePenis Dimension
Pick Me, I"m CleanPlanet Of My DreamsPlastic People
Po-jama PeoplePoofter"s Froth Wyoming Plans AheadPROLOGUE
Pygmy TwylyteRat TomagoRoad Ladies
Rubber ShirtRudy Wants To Buy Yez A DrinkSan Ber"dino
SCRUTINIZER"S POSTLUDESexSharleena
She Painted Up Her FaceShove It Right InSleepin In A Jar
Society PagesSofa No. 2Sofa
Son Of Orange CountySon Of Suzy CreamcheeseSt. Alfonzo"s Pancake Breakfast
Status Back BabyStevie"s SpankingStick Together
Stink-footStuff Up The CracksSuicide Chump
Take Your Clothes Off When You DanceTeen-age ProstituteTeen-age Wind
Tell Me You Love MeThat Evil PrinceThe "Torchum" Never Stops
The AirThe Black Page Drum Solo/ Black Page #1The Blue Light
The Closer You AreThe Crab-grass BabyThe Curtain Rises
The Dangerous KitchenThe Duke Of PrunesThe Duke Regains His Chops
The Idiot Bastard SonThe Illinois Enema BanditThe Jazz Discharge Party Hats
The Mammy NunsThe Man From Utopia Meets Mary Lou (Medley)The Massive Improve"lence
The Meek Shall Inherit NothingThe Mud SharkThe Purple Lagoon
The Radio Is BrokenThe Sheik Yerbouti TangoThe Uncle Meat Variations
The White Boy TroublesThis Town Is A Sealed Tuna SandwichTinsel Town Rebellion
Titties & BeerTrouble Every DayTruck Driver Divorce
Tryin" To Grow A ChinTuna Fish PromenadeUncle Bernie"s Farm
Uncle RemusValley GirlVillage Of The Sun
Wait A MinuteWhat Ever Happened To All The Fun In The WorldWhat Kind Of Girl Do You Think We Are
What Will This Evening Bring Me This MorningWhat"s The Ugliest Part Of Your Body?Whippin" Post
Who Are The Brain Police?Who Needs The Peace Corps?Wild Love
Willie The PimpWistful Wit A Fist-fullWon Ton On
Would You Go All The WayWould You Like A Snack?Wowie Zowie
Yo" MamaYou Are What You IsYou Didn"t Try To Call Me
You"re Probably Wondering Why I"m HereYour MouthZomby Woof
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